Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Oh the Things People Say

Since bringing home the girls we have had a wide variety of conversations with people who are interested in our family - because well we do stand out.  White older parents and tiny, cute, highly intelligent and friendly twin girls from China do tend to get noticed.  There are several types of people who we have encountered.

First there are those who are just downright rude and they don't care.  They either think they are funny or really don't think at all.  Some just stare at you or they ask questions like, "How much did they cost?" Or "Were they buy one, get one free?" Or "Oh yeah China - they throw away girls there don't they?" I used to not know how to respond to those types, now I give them the you gotta be kidding look and move away as quickly as possible.  

Then there are those who are curious maybe just because they are or because they have thought about adoption.  They ask questions like,"Are they real sisters?" Or, "Did you know you were going to get twins right away?" Or "Why didn't you adopt domestically since there are so many kids in Foster care here."  I try to answer their questions if I think they are really interested in adoption or they are polite.

Then there are those who have adopted, are adopting, are adopted or want to adopt.  They usually are the ones who are the most cautious.  They some times don't say anything or just look at you.  Or like the time the mom and daughter ran up to me at Costco and asked what Province the girls were from and if they were twins because the daughter was a twin adopted from China.  We had the nicest talk.

I know that one day the girls might not want to "talk" about being adopted, but right now they are proud that they are adopted.  Heck for a while they thought everyone built their family through adoption.  We have tried to always talk openly with our girls, but if they do one day decide they don't want to talk about it with people in public I will respect their wishes.  After all like I've said before it is their story.

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